Archive for the ‘Goobers’ category

“we are Christians and patriots”

July 12, 2007

And jerks:

A Hindu clergyman made history Thursday by offering the U.S. Senate’s morning prayer, but only after police officers removed three shouting protesters from the visitors’ gallery.

Rajan Zed, director of interfaith relations at a Hindu temple, gave the brief prayer that opens each day’s Senate session. As he stood at the chamber’s podium in a bright orange and burgundy robe, two women and a man began shouting “this is an abomination” and other complaints from the gallery.

Police officers quickly arrested them and charged them with disrupting Congress, a misdemeanor. The male protester told an Associated Press reporter, “we are Christians and patriots” before police handcuffed them and led them away.

Lest you think this is just a few nutcases . . .

For several days, the Mississippi-based American Family Association has urged its members to object to the prayer because Zed would be “seeking the invocation of a non-monotheistic god.”

See, that’s the thing about eliminating the wall of separation: you never know who is going cross the boundary. Much better, I think, to let the government perform it’s duties without any civic religion.

“That’s When The Whores Come In”

July 10, 2007

My Senator, David Vitter, just a few years ago:

Louisiana Senator David Vitter, speaking at a Lafayette Parish Republican Executive Committee luncheon, referred to hurricanes Katrina and Rita coming through the same areas as a same-sex marriage.

In his statements at the luncheon, Vitter referred to the impact of both hurricanes on the Lafayette area. “Unfortunately, it’s the crossroads where Katrina meets Rita,” said Vitter. “I always knew I was against same-sex unions.”

And again, this time speaking in the U.S. Senate about the anti-gay marriage constitutional amendment:

“I don’t believe there’s any issue that’s more important than this one,”

Those statements, like similar ones made by other idiots, are patently ridiculous. But they are even more astoundingly moronic in light of today’s news:

Louisiana Sen. David Vitter, whose telephone number was disclosed by the so-called “D.C. Madam” accused of running a prostitution ring, says he is sorry for a “serious sin” and that he has already made peace with his wife.

“This was a very serious sin in my past for which I am, of course, completely responsible,” Vitter said Monday in a printed statement. “Several years ago, I asked for and received forgiveness from God and my wife in confession and marriage counseling. Out of respect for my family, I will keep my discussion of the matter there — with God and them. But I certainly offer my deep and sincere apologies to all I have disappointed and let down in any way.”

Remember now, gay folks who want to marry are assaulting marriage and destroying America; conservative Christian right wing Republican straight white American males who go out whoring it up while wifey is oblivious at home, well, they’re just defending traditional values. Oh, and gay love is such a matter of public concern that we need a constitution amendment to prevent it’s public recognition. When married elected officials use their tax payer paid salary on whores, well, that’s a matter solely between the sinner and God.

“I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.”

O.k., now that I’m done puking, let me make a few points.

One, this would be a really dumb reason for anyone to vote against Vitter in the next election. Sorry, but my only concern is how well he represents Louisiana. What he does in his own time matters only in so far as it affects his representation. I don’t see how picking up a whore is relevant.

While the general principle in point one remains true, it doesn’t apply to Vitter. Why not? Here’s why not:

Sen. David Vitter (R-LA) first got his start in Congress after replacing former Rep. Bob Livingston (R-LA), who “abruptly resigned after disclosures of numerous affairs” in 1998. At the time, Vitter argued that an extramarital affair was grounds for resignation:

“I think Livingston’s stepping down makes a very powerful argument that Clinton should resign as well and move beyond this mess,” he said. [Atlanta Journal and Constitution, 12/20/98]

Two, even for people who would take this into account, when it comes time to vote, I don’t think it will matter. I mean, it’s not like it was a male crack whore, or a teenage kid. Heck, Vitter can’t even hold a candle to his fellow Louisianans when it comes to scandals. The standard has been set too low; compared to the Haggards, Foleys and Jeffersons of the world, Vitter is an angel.

Third, I can respect an honest fundamentalist, for folks like Vitter, though, I have nothing but disdain. He’s out cheating on his wife with a f**king whore while at the same time telling committed and loving gay couples across this country that their love is more dangerous than a Category five hurricane? That’s some serious chutzpah. And the guy is Harvard educated; he can’t be so stupid that he actually failed to see the hypocrisy. He just didn’t care. Honesty? Integrity? Wisdom? Hell, basic human decency? He traded ’em all for a chance to pander to ignorant a**holes.

Wait, who’s the whore, again?

Now he says the issue is between him and God. Well, I hope God introduces him to a few of the committed gay couples he feared, so that they can explain to him what marriage is really about.

KS: Local Muslims Oppose BBQ On Fridays

July 6, 2007

Here’s the story:

A belief that [Fridays] “should be set aside for the worship of God” is the reason a spokesman for a coalition of [Mosques] and other [Muslims] in Wichita, Kansas, says they made a strong push to finish obtaining enough signatures yesterday to turn in a petition opposing their city’s [Friday Pork BBQ] sales. . . .

“It’s a moral issue,” claims [Mullah] Moore. “It is [Friday]. I don’t think that [BBQ] stores should be open on [Friday], because [Friday] is a day of worship …. it’s a day of rest.”

O.K., so I changed a few things, but nothing material.

ACLU: “American Taliban” or True Patriots?

July 5, 2007

Of course, the real American Taliban is all over this:

Unless a federal judge orders it down, an icon of Jesus holding biblical quotations about justice will stay up in the [Slidell, La] city court lobby, a judge said Saturday.

The American Civil Liberties Union has said it will take the court to court unless the icon and a plaque below it reading “To Know Peace, Obey These Laws” are removed by Monday.

And the Mayor of Slidell’s incredibly ridiculous reaction sounds like it came straight from the mouth of Roy Moore or one of his sycophants:

Mayor Ben Morris said he was ready to fight. “I fight daily with FEMA for the recovery of our city, and now we must fight with these tyrants, this American Taliban who seek to destroy our culture and our heritage,” he said.

Let me get this straight, Mayor. You want to give official government endorsement to a particular type of Christianity, while the ACLU wants to force the government to be neutral in all matters religious, yet it’s the ACLU who is the Taliban? If that’s how it is, let’s just stop talking right now, because words have no meaning.

As for the “our culture and our heritage” thing, the picture is a reproduction of a 16th Century Russian Orthodox painting in which Jesus is holding a Russian Bible, hence this reply from a fellow Louisiana blogger:

“Our culture and our heritage”? What heritage?!! Our Russian Orthodox heritage!? No one knew what the hell the words on the portrait even meant, and now everyone is going apenuts! People were being instructed, in the courthouse, to “obey” laws written in a language they didn’t understand, yet when someone complains and wants the picture removed, the judges and mayors raise hell about how “our” sacred “culture” is being destroyed.

As another La Blogger says, it’s a good thing for the mayor that

the ACLU respects your right to spout off like an idiot…

Seriously, though, I understand people who wonder why anyone would get irritated at a silly painting, especially if no-one can even read it. It does seem like de minimis harm.

I happen to think otherwise. I would not want to go to court and have to look at a picture of Muhammad telling me to obey his rules. Hence, I’m not going to make anyone look at pictures of my God. The golden rule, and all that.

But still, even if I thought this was a de minimis injury, I’d be happy that the ACLU was suing the city (and others who do similar stuff). Why? Mostly because the ACLU’s fights in these little cases are what prevents big problems. In other words, because government officials know that doing something as innocuous as putting up a ten commandments monument in a park can lead to a lawsuit, those same officials are very unlikely to do something really crazy like mandating church attendance. Or to put the same thing another way, if no one opposed Roy Moore and his types in these government religious display cases, what do suppose their next idea would be?

We enjoy religious freedom not because our government officials are wise and good. We enjoy it because people like those with the ACLU have the courage to fight for it.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

May 24, 2007

Please, God, please don’t let this happen:

Jefferson County Commissioner Larry Langford has not announced his candidacy for mayor of Birmingham, but a statement he made in a meeting today caught listeners’ attention.

In response to statements from transit advocates in a meeting with commissioners, Langford said, “Birmingham has transit problems that need to be fixed, and it will be fixed in October.” The mayoral election is Oct. 9, and Langford has been widely discussed as a potential candidate.

God Beats Football!

May 17, 2007

At the high school level anyway:

The Hoover High football team’s appearance in a nationally televised event is in jeopardy, thanks to a ruling by the Alabama High School Athletic Association.

A unanimous vote by the AHSAA Central Board of Control on Wednesday denied the Bucs’ request to play in a Sept.2 game that is part of the third annual Kirk Herbstreit Ohio vs. USA Challenge.

The reason? The game falls on a Sunday.

The Labor Day Weekend matchup of Hoover vs. Ohio power Colerain High was set to be aired live on ESPN2. The kickoff was slated for 12:37 p.m. at Nippert Stadium on the campus of the University of Cincinnati.

Sunday is a day of worship,” said Dan Washburn, the AHSAA executive director, when citing the reason for denying Hoover’s application to play an out-of-state opponent.

There is no specific written rule that prohibits games from being played on a Sunday, Washburn said, but it is “policy established through practice.”

First, kids, do you know what “arbitrary and capricious” means? If not, the lawsuit will enlighten you.

Second, even if there was an actual rule prohibiting games on Sunday, Mr. Washburn pretty much just guaranteed that the rule is unconstitutional. My basic understanding is that “blue laws” – laws prohibiting activities on Sunday – are constiutional so long as they have a secular purpose. If, though, the purpose is to promote church going – as Mr. Washburn just proudly announced – the law violates the First Amendment.

But even if it doesn’t violate the first amendment, it’s a dumb rule. The title to Kathy’s post says it best: “Good Thing There’s No Jewish Kids on the Team.” To put the same thing another way, I don’t want to have to give up my activities so that someone else can worship Allah, so I’m not going to make anyone else curtail their lives so that I can go to Mass.

Why is it so hard to understand that not everyone holds the same religious beliefs?

“God Hates Jerry Falwell”

May 16, 2007

Really:

Nothing I can add to that. But here’s a list of his life’s work if you’re wondering what led to Falwell’s condemnation.

Oh, and if you want a different perspective, here’s Tinky Winky’s Falwell eulogy.

UPDATE: Jesus’ General links here with “The Lord Works in Mysterious Ways.” And so to does the blogosphere. Act in mysterious ways, that is, as this post – one absent any commentary or insight (and needing none; the insanity speaking for itself) – had already become my all time most visited, even without all the guests referred by the General.