“It’s an idiot’s guide to terrorism”

I’m sure there’s plenty of smart assed comments to be made about that statement from Alabama’s Homeland Security director, Jim Walker.

To be fair, though he was not discussing Dubya’s latest stay the course in Iraq speech, just Alabama’s homeland security website, which until recently warned us good subservient citizens that:

domestic terrorists are found in many single-issue movements. Among them are anti-government groups that believe the “current government is violating the basic principles laid out by the U.S. Constitution.”

“In general, these terrorists claim that the U.S. government is infringing on their individual rights, and/or that the government’s policies are criminal and immoral,” the Web site stated. “Such groups may hold that the current government is violating the basic principles laid out by the U.S. Constitution and that a new world order is attempting to enslave humanity.”

Right. So who isn’t a terrorist then?

“By the Web site standards mentioned, opposition to gun control laws and excessive taxation makes one a terrorist. Insisting that we adhere to the Constitution makes one a terrorist,” said Stephen P. Gordon, political director of the Libertarian National Committee.

“Lawfully demanding that the federal government protect, as opposed to usurp, the individual rights outlined in the Bill of Rights makes one a terrorist. The two groups of people who most typify the description I just provided are our Founding Fathers and Libertarians. It seems that Alabama Homeland Security would incarcerate Madison, Washington and Jefferson at Guantanamo Bay, if they had that option,” he said.

No doubt they would. And then they would label as America Hating Terrorist Sympathizers anyone who insisted that the government prove in a court of law that the Founders actually are terrorists. On second thought, I guess arguing that the government has to obey the law makes you a terrorist, so if you demanded a fair trial for the Founders, you’d be joining them in Guantanamo.

But hey, at least we’re safe.   

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2 Comments on ““It’s an idiot’s guide to terrorism””

  1. ALmod Says:

    Technically, considering that they worked together to overthrow a government and were not a recognized millitary, they could have been considered terrorists by today’s standards. The British government saw them as traitors, and several supporters (Nathan Hale comes to mind) were hanged.


  2. i have dedicated my life to the cause of chunky peanut butter and nothing will stop me from achieving the triumph of a world which has only chunky peanut butter. The Alabama Homeland Security website tried to thwart me, but now its warnings about me have been taken down.


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