“Y’all know me. Know how I earn a livin’. I’ll catch this bird for you, but it ain’t gonna be easy.”
As the Limestone County Commission meeting ended Wednesday, a man ambled in wearing sunglasses, a cap and a Tennessee Vols shirt, and offered his beaver services.
Commissioners perked up not at the word “beaver” but at the words “for free.”
Scott Wilson of Athens told commissioners he would trap beavers free of charge for their constituents because he sells the fur.
“Beavers are a nuisance,” said District 1 Commissioner Gary Daly. “In my area, they’re stopping up bridges and creeks and making fields and yards flood.”
Wilson said he recently trapped 11 beavers in a pond off Strain Road, and one weighed 67 pounds.
Wilson’s doing it for free, but he’ll get to keep “the head, the tail, the whole damn thing.”
And speakin’ of stuff that “will swallow you whole. No shakin’, no tenderizin’, down you go.”
It’s not every day that Hartselle Police Department is inundated with calls about huge snakes. Then there was Tuesday.
“I thought it would be just a routine call about another snake,” Sgt. James Holladay said.
To the contrary.
When Holladay arrived at Nance Ford Road near New Covenant Church he spotted something he described as “huge.”
It turned out to be an 11-foot python.
With the assistance of a passerby, Holladay, and Lt. Robert Finn captured the snake and turned it over to animal control officer Regina Jenkins.
The best part of that story:
Now, the Police Department is faced with the challenge of finding the snake’s owner.
That may be difficult because more than 10 years ago, Hartselle responded to the same area when a homeowner lost a two-foot python.
“I think somebody spotted that snake on their back porch,” Court Clerk Magistrate Stan Holt said.
Holt was a dispatcher at the time.
Hartselle Human Resource Administrator Melee Haney said her mother thought about buying a home in the area on Nance Ford Road, but did not because she heard about the two-foot python being missing.
“The real estate agent told her that the former homeowner had a python to come up missing and they never found it,” Haney said.
I wouldn’t have bought the house, either.