The Apocalypse Is Upon Us

In the news today:

Interest payments on college student loans will take a big jump Saturday, continuing the ripple effect from the Federal Reserve’s recent spurt in rate hikes that has caused borrowing costs to soar the past two years.

The rate on Stafford loans will climb from 5.3 percent to 7.14 percent. New loans issued beginning Saturday will start at 6.8 percent, according to Bankrate.com, a Florida-based research firm. The loan rate for Plus college loans will climb from 6.1 percent to 7.94 percent. Plus loans issued starting Saturday will begin at 8.5 percent.

In my in-box on Tuesday:

[written over a fiery red mushroom cloud background and around a picture of attractive young people staring at a computer with mouths agape in shock]

This Saturday, July 1, student loan interest rates are going to EXPLODE, and they’re taking thousands of your dollars with them.

Interest rates are rising by nearly 2% this Saturday—doesn’t sound like a lot, does it? But that tiny 2%, when compounded, is going to burst into a mushroom cloud of ever-expanding debt, enveloping you and your loved ones in smothering monthly payments and detonating your dreams of financial prosperity.

There is one way to save yourself from this student loan apocalypse: Finish your consolidation application now.

As you know, student loan consolidation is a financial bomb shelter where you can lock in a low interest rate for the life of you loans, saving them from the mayhem of rising rates forever. Your friends and neighbors may be hemorrhaging cash in the flaming whirlwinds of financial “aid,” but you and your money will be safe for the remainder of your student loan repayment.

I used to say “I may be a lawyer, but at least I’m not a politician or car salesman.” I think I’ll add marketing specialist to the list.

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