No Returns

According to this story, earlier this month, a couple visited an “adult toy store” in Decatur, “stealing enhancement pills and a ‘king size’ rubber sex toy resembling a part of the male anatomy.” A few weeks later, local police caught the bandits.

[The cops] found the lifelike, 9-inch toy stolen three weeks earlier. The $50 device was no longer in its package, said Detective George Silvestri.

“Well, we kind of recovered the stolen property,” said [a detective]. “But basically, the store manager declined taking it back.”

Gee, why wouldn’t he take it back?

Btw, selling “adult toys” is a crime in Alabama. Alabama Code 13A-12-200.2 states in part:

It shall be unlawful for any person to knowingly distribute, possess with intent to distribute, or offer or agree to distribute any obscene material or any device designed or marketed as useful primarily for the stimulation of human genital organs for any thing of pecuniary value.

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