Res Ipsa Loquitur

In other words, Democratic A.G. hopeful Larry Darby’s “A” to the Montgomery Advertiser’s “Q” speaks for itself (but that won’t keep me from commenting on it).

The question: “What do you see as the biggest issue facing the state that the attorney general can have an impact on, and how would you address it if elected. Please explain why.”

The answer:

To stop the Mexican invasion I will ask the governor to declare martial law for the purpose of using either the de-federalized National Guard troops or the activated Alabama State Defense Force.

County sheriffs and a revitalized community-based constabulary will be the first defenders used to ferret out Mexican invaders already present in Alabama. Mestizos will be treated as prisoners of war and escorted to exit points.

Forces at work in Alabama that have actively promoted open borders in the United States caused this crisis affecting all Southern states. I will declare the Southern Poverty Law Center Alabama’s Public Enemy No. 1 and launch a probe into its activities since its inception with a purpose of emptying its coffers, estimated in 2005 at $193 million, and running them out of Alabama.

Major Alabama newspapers owned by foreign corporations appear complicit in treason against Alabama, as are the owners and management of the Southern Poverty Law Center. Reporters and editors continuously write articles promoting foreign and subversive ideologies that over the decades have distorted perceptions of Alabama in other parts of the United States and the world. The Code of Alabama provides for prosecution against defamation, fraud and harassment. Foreign corporations who act to dumb-down or mislead Alabamians will be scrutinized for violations of criminal and civil laws.

How many different unconstitutional activities is he advocating? Lets see. For starters, states do not have the power to throw people out of the country. States cannot declare war. Suing only the foreign corporations probably violates the commerce clause. Targeting the SPLC based on their advocacy would be a First Amendment violation. Attacking news papers because they promote “ideologies” would also violate the First Amendment. But hey, why would the Attorney General care about the law?

Especially considering the current invasion. I mean, we are in a war here; times are desperate. Just last night, in fact, I decided to watch a movie. As I settled down, pizza in one hand, beer in the other, a.c. blowing coolly through the room, do you know what happened? I had to suffer the indignity of seeing the FBI anti-piracy warning TWICE! Once in English, and then again in some demonic foreign tongue! Can you believe that. It’s outrageous, just outrageous. Desperate times call for desperate men like Jeff Sessions, er, I mean John Gilchrist, oh, geez, uh, Larry Darby.

Be sure to read the rest of the Q&A, it only gets better. (Update: Bama Blog has a great collection of what various in and out of state bloggers have to say about Darby. Yet another wonderful ambassador for our state. sigh.).

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