In Nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti
So those crazy Presbyterians, meeting here in B'ham, have decided on some new names for the Trinity. "Father, Son and Holy Spirit" remains the official name, but here are some authorized new variations:
"Compassionate mother, beloved child and lifegiving womb."
"Rainbow of Promise, Ark of Salvation and Dove of Peace"
"Speaker, Word and Breath"
"Giver, Gift, and Giving"
"Lover, Beloved and Love that binds together Lover and Beloved"
"Rock, Cornerstone, and Temple"
The Southern Baptist Convention just finished their meeting, and this got me to wondering what new names they would suggest for the Trinity. My initial thoughts:
Bush, Scalia, and DeLay
Belt Wielding Father, Obedient Child, and Silent-Unless-Spoken-to Womb Possessor (not owner)
Gun, Bullet, and Powder
Tsunami of Judgment, Hurricane of Righteousness, and FEMA of Hope
Warden, Guard, and Potassium Chloride
Cross Burner, Wall Builder, and Hatred of Immigrants that binds them together
Intelligent Designer, Homo Despiser, and Flag Idolizer
Domestic Spyer, Congressional Complier, and Fear Monger who makes it all possible
Monument, Courthouse, and Roy Moore
Any other suggestions? Or should we stick with the original?
June 20, 2006 at 12:33 pm
My personal favorite – “Tsunami of Judgment, Hurricane of Righteousness, and FEMA of Hope.” Did you come up with these on your own? They’re hilarious, but maybe, just maybe – the original will do for now.
June 20, 2006 at 1:35 pm
If the choice is the original or one of the SBC’s, I’ll stick with the original. Excellent job!
June 20, 2006 at 4:59 pm
“Warden, Guard, and Potassium Chloride”
teehee…except it’s more sad than funny.
June 20, 2006 at 10:41 pm
Oh my…I’m concerned my rights have been violated.
I’m Presbyterian, and I didn’t get to vote.
Perhaps I should have attended the big meeting.